Woah Oh!

Things I'm waiting for: The MTV Movie Awards tonight. The Taylor Swift Concert/Dateline thing tonight. June 8th, when I go to Las Vegas. July 1st, when James Perse's new Malibu Collection comes out. July 17th, the opening of (500) Days of Summer. July 21st, when Brooke White's new album; High Hopes & Heartbreak comes out. September 9th, which is the release date for Kaleb Nation's book, Bran Hambric. A certain night in Fall when the first season of Glee begins. The end of August when I start school again. Christmas.

And that is all.

"Woah Oh! Woah-woah Oh! Why do I put myself in these situations? Woah Oh! Woah-woah Oh! I keep pushing myself even though I can't take it all! You're worth losing my self-esteem, your clever words mean nothing more to me than a lot of hurt in a movie." - Forever The Sickest Kids [Feat. Selena Gomez]

We.

We, as a country, are corrupt.
We kill for others to live.
We judge by the un-changeable pigment of someone's skin.
We care more about the lives of people on the pages of magazines than our own.
We hear about children dying in far off places from starvation, while we sit there, eating only half of the huge meal laid before us.

We study to get good grades so we can get into a good college, then we study even harder so we can graduate from that college, and spend the rest of our lives working.
We laugh at the pain of others.
We lie and we cheat and we steal.
We crush and we destroy and we kill.
And we don't even give a shit that we're doing it.

I suppose this can be called a poem. But, to me, it's something that I came up with and wrote down on my leg whilst I was baking in a car outside of the Home Depot.

Show Me Everything You've Got

I'm at my grandma's motorcycle shop. I'm eating a really tiny poppy seed muffin. I just left school and it's 5PM. That's kinda sad. Anyway, we went to the water park (Wet N' Wild) today. It was actually a lot more fun than I expected. This weekend I have to study for Math & Science finals, and go get a dress for graduation - I'll probably go to Saks 5th Avenue on Sunday to do that, though.
On another note, I really hope one of my boxes came today. I haven't got my Mitchell Davis merch that I ordered like a month ago, or the four books that I ordered about a week ago. So, yeah.

"Slide your feet, create the shock. Touch another, watch it pop. Live a little, live a lot... and show me everything you've got." - The Rocket Summer

Who You Are Without Me

We - our lives - are intertwined by the smallest and biggest of things. For some, it could be five flights around the world, twenty-nine taxi cabs, eight cups of coffee, and two angry red heads. For others, it could be something as simple as a dropped penny. But what if these chains of events never happened? What if it was four flights instead of five? What if it was one angry red head and one sad one? What if it was a quarter, rather than a penny? Would we still be in the hands of the people we're in today? Would we know what we know now? Would I be sitting here, on a Tuesday, watching old Star Trek movies with my mom passed out on the couch beside me? The answer is no. The answer will always be no.

I can't define this as a blog - it's more of a rambling of some sort. As my title says, it's a simple rambling.

"I'm not your anchor, so don't hold on. I'm not the answer, you got me wrong. I'm not your savior, save your energy go find out who you are, who you are without me." - Kate Voegele.

The Actress and I

After I write this, I'll go to sleep. I'm watching Saturday Night live and drinking my third Vitamin Water in the past two hours. I did nothing productive today. I woke up, I read two books, I went back to sleep, I woke up again, I watched the Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy, I went outside and took pictures with my Canon (which I will get developed once I get a new black light and rinse), I learned how to play Battlefield by Jordin Sparks on the piano, and now here I am. Tada? 

Tomorrow I'm going to breakfast in town, then I'm going to the movies to see Angels & Demons, then I'm going to come home and work on my bible paper. How fun...

"So how are the stars tonight in Hollywood? Cause I'm watching the planes back home. We've got time on our hands, but we don't got time in advance." - Mat Musto

Lights Out

I just ordered four books off of Amazon that aren't available in Borders: The Midnight Twins by Jacquelyn Mitchard, Wide Awake by David Levithan, Maybe by Brent Runyon, and The Diamond of Darkhold by Jeanne Duprau. I've been waiting to get The Diamond of Darkhold for a year now, ever since I started reading The City Of Ember series, but it's always been sold out. This is an exciting thing for me. I'm also kinda excited about getting Wide Awake by David Levithan, since it's about Gays + Jesus. That's always an interesting combination. 

In conclusion, I read too much.

"Punch your lights out, hit the pavement, that's what I call entertainment. Causin' problems makes you famous, all the violence makes a statement. She better get with the club." - Mindless Self Indulgence

Shattered

I'm in the process of trying to convince my mom to buy me a Sony HDR-SR11 Camcorder. It's expensive, but I'm set on getting it. That, and of course, my Cadillac 2012 XLR Syron. But that's another story for another day. On a happier note, IT'S FRIDAY! It's the day that I sleep and watch re-runs of Reba. How about a round of applause for me? Mhm. I'm probably going to go to American Apparel on Sunday and get a new bathing suit for next FRIDAY. (That's right. FRIDAY is capitalized from now on.)

"And I've lost who I am and I can't understand why my heart is so broken rejecting your love, without love gone wrong, lifeless words carry on, but I know, all I know is that the end's beginning who I am from the start, take me home to my heart, let me go, and I will run, I will not be silent, all this time spent in vain, wasted years, wasted gain, all is lost, hope remains, and this war's not over. There's a light, there's a sun, taking all the shattered ones, to the place we belong - and his love will conquor." - Trading Yesterday

Wrecked

Wrecked by E.R. Frank. Page 247. Paragraph 3:

"Mostly you realize you can handle it. You'd rather turn it all upside down and dump it out and watch it scatter and disappear. You'd rather do that, because you don't want to have to handle it. You really don't. It's too stupid and crazy and incredibly, incredibly unfair. But you do handle it. Because the thing you learn is that you can." - Anna (E.R. Frank)

I'm staying home from school. I have so much work to do and so much food to throw up. I think I have the intestinal flu, although, I really hope not.

No song quote today. A book quote is enough for now.

The Show

I'm sick. I left school early today and threw up all the way home. I slept for an hour and dreamt that I was in Hannah Montana with Christopher Drew and we were hiding in a ball pit - throwing balls at Hannah Montana whenever we saw her. Then her bodyguard came and began yelling at me. Then my mom called me and woke me up from my dream. I'm not happy about that last part. I'm cutting this short... I'm going to go throw up now.

"I'm just a little bit caught in the middle, life is a maze, and love is a riddle. I don't know where to go, can't do it alone, I try, and I don't know why I'm just a little girl lost in the moment, I'm so scared, but I don't show it. I can't figure it out, it's bringing me down, I know I've got to let it go - and just enjoy the show." - Lenka.

I'd Lie

I'm angry that I have to learn a huge piano piece by Thursday. I'm angry that I suck at school. I'm angry that I have the song 'Lollipop' by Mika stuck in my head. I'm angry that I have to memorize this damn Shakespeare monologue. I'm angry that I stabbed myself with a needle. I'm angry that I threw up an eraser. I'm angry that my iPod is broken. I'm angry that I have to charge my camera. I'm angry that I have Science homework. I'm angry that I have Math homework. I'm angry that I'm out of strawberry ice cream. I'm angry that I can never just tell people how I really feel.

I'm angry that I'm angry.

"He sees everything black and white, never let nobody see him cry. I don't let anybody see me wishing he wasn't mine... I could tell you, his favorite color's green. He loves to argue, born on the 17th. His sister's beautiful, he has his fathers' eyes. And if you asked me if I love him, I'd lie." - Taylor Swift

Trainwreck

I've been listening to Trainwreck by Demi Lovato for four hours straight. I just watched Britney Spears: For The Record two times in a row. My hair is lifeless. It's stiff and doesn't move, and my bangs are the only things that have volume. This is just sad. To top it all off, the Big Bang Theory is over until Season 3. Plus, How I Met Your Mother wasn't all that great tonight. 

Oh, and I'm out of Vitamin Water. (Sobcry). Demetri Martin better cheer me up.

"And you said we wouldn't make it, but look how far we've come! For so long my heart was breaking, but now we're standing strong. The things you say make me fall harder each day. You're a trainwreck, but I wouldn't love you if you changed." - Demi Lovato